Of the few defining moments in my
life, two come to my mind prominently; my father and mother’s marriage and my
adoption into the Keller household. Defining moments often shape who we are,
our future, and how we respond to events further on down the road of life. There are both good and bad moments,
producing positive and negative results, but what you do with those results is
up to you. You can either choose to
learn from the negative, or allow it to rend you limb from limb. Positive events almost always produce
positive results, but you can allow even those to infect your brain with a sort
of mightier-than-thou attitude. To be
blunt, defining moments are our story; let it shape you into who you are meant
to be.
When
my parents first met, I was being babysat by my grandmother, but I’m sure their
first meeting went great. They are
married after all. I was a tender three
when it happened, and having lived a life with a hard-working mother and father
who was never around, knew nothing about a happy normal home. To be correct, I knew nothing about a happy
home; separation among parents is normal.
Although I was young, I remember holding my mother’s hand as she walked,
and watching as tears of joy ran down her face.
Up until that point, I had been the only man who had ever consistently
been there for her; I didn’t have a choice in the matter, but I would have
stayed even if I had. However now I was
able to see what love and sacrifice were really about. My father took my mother and I in, even with
her tattered past and my abandonment from my “sperm donor dad”. This was love, and sacrifice at its
purest. Something I still haven’t
forgotten.
Secondly
came my adoption, and that almost seven years later. How I would love to tell you of a perfect
life, but those aren’t real or true, and frankly quite boring. My parents fought like any other, I bowed my
head to anger often, and hated the air that often clogged our home. Yet, my parents pushed through, and I believe
that it was a small defining moments in itself.
When I was ten my parents approached me with talk of adoption, in fact I
was the only member or the then household of five to still have the name Rice. Keller, I thought, was better because
everyone else had it. My mother hadn’t
let the conversation happen until I was ten, as she feared things between her
and my soon to be adopted dad may not work out.
Thankfully she was wrong, and today I proudly hold the title Keller. This moment exuded love, and the tears that
ran down my face in genuine bliss after the process had finally been completed
couldn’t have been truer. I knew then
that this man, who had married my mother, wouldn’t leave me like my other
father. But instead would stand by my
side, and teach my things every man needs to know.
These
seemingly insignificant examples of defining moments changed my life, for the
better a thousand times over. Up until
then I had received multiple negative ones, and I still have work to do on my
heart from the scars in my past. However
the blessings of those two defining moments have changed my forever. I am a man because of those two events,
because without them, I wouldn’t have a father; without a father, who can learn
to be a man?
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